Friday, November 14, 2008

馬鹿の愚か者 (what's with the romaji, jon?)


from // this event will be held in st. pete

"Here's how chicago does it:
(FAQ from )
The Chiditarod Rules

* General
* 2008


Carts outside of twisted spoke, 2007
The Iditarod is the famous long-distance race in which yelping dogs tow a sled across Alaska. Our Chiditarod is pretty much the same thing, except that instead of dogs, it's people, instead of sleds, it's shopping carts, and instead of Alaska, it's Chicago.

Who can race?
Anyone can race and everyone should race, as long as you are at least 21 years old. You can forward this invitation to anyone you know.

Isn't it going to be cold?
Absolutely. The race goes off rain or shine, blizzard, breeze or tornado. What does this mean? Well, if there is a foot of snow on the ground, be prepared. Teams have built sled attachments to their carts to handle such situations. In any cast, bundle up!

What is this going to cost me?
Dignity. Plus, there is a $5 per person entry fee. That money pays back limited expenses. Everything else is prize money. One of the best things about the Chiditarod is that there are tons of ways to participate and win. See our prizes page for the latest information on how you too can be a winner with the Chiditarod. Cash? We'll spread it around. Promise.

How do I register?
You may register online up until 12 hours before the race. You can also register in the morning starting at 11 am.

What's the route?
That's up to you. The race will begin at 12:30 pm SHARP. You choose the fastest path between the start, each checkpoint, and the finish. Your team will stay at each checkpoint for 20 minutes before continuing on your journey.

Are there rules?
Yes, quite a few of them. The carts must be pulled doggy-sled style. That means that each team must have four people in front with ropes pulling the cart (the dawgs), and one person running behind the cart steering (the musher). This configuration represents the theoretically ideal power-to-steerage ratio of 4:1, and must be observed at all times.

However, dawgs and mushers are free to trade off at the checkpoints. All team members must finish together - no stray dogs! (Of course dogs and musher may run free while they're being watered at the checkpoints.) There will be marshalls along the route to ensure proper form, function, and of course, safety...
The Chiditarod is also a food drive - 25 pounds per cart!

In addition to being an outstandingly fun time, and to give back to the community, the Chiditarod is also a food drive. Your cart has to cross the finish line with 25 pounds of food or more! You can hide food along the way, have your friends meet you with it, or have it stuffed in your pocket when the gun goes off - it's up to you. Just don't forget your groceries at the finish line. Remember - there is a substantial prize for the team that collects the most poundage of food and has the best food presentation! And please - high-protein non-perishable foods are highly preferred.

Can we use public transportation?

Can we use private transportation?
No. This occured in 2007 by the Bunnies. Be assured that this will result in immediate disqualification and public flogging.

Can I bring my real dogs?
No...please, no.

Can we try to prevent other teams from winning? i.e. sabotage?
Everyone enjoys some good competition... In other words, creative, non-destructive uses of sabotage are tolerated (and actually encouraged by some). There might even be a prize for the best sabotage. So be prepared to give and receive, racers! DO NOT endanger each other. You will be disqualified.

Should I obey city traffic laws?
You should obey all applicable traffic and civil laws. Unless, of course, you want to become one with your cart and/or the concrete and/or the back seat of a police van, we highly recommend obeying all traffic laws. Good luck!

How do I design my sled/harness?
With full regard to both safety and all relevant civil, criminal, and physical laws. See below for more information.

Who has the final say?
The judges. The judges have final say over all prizes and winners. This is complete and final.

Does my team need its own shopping cart?

Where do we get a cart?
There are many places where one can acquire the standard grocery-size shopping cart that you will need to participate. Ask your local supermarket if they will lend you a cart for the "race of the century." They will be glad to participate in this unique event. Give it back to them as a work of art after the race.

You may also purchase a cart. Google found these websites:

Can we decorate or modify our shopping cart?
Yes, of course! However, there are rules -- kind of like stock car racing.

* Your shopping cart must roll on four rubber caster wheels.
* The only exception is that you can attach some sort of sled substructure to the bottom of the cart in case of deep snow or treacherous ice.
* As a general rule, you can attach things to your cart, make a riding platform, and grease up your wheels.
* You can also chop up the cart and rearrange the pieces -- but they all have to be attached somewhere else on the cart. All original pieces must be accounted for.
* Your shopping cart cannot be motorized, nor can you use any type of bike/pedal structure for propulsion.
* You must use a normal-sized cart, i.e. not one of those baby carts from Whole Foods.
* All four "dogs" must pull the cart with ropes of some sort.
* If you don't like the idea of being tied to a moving shopping cart, handling the ropes is fine and possibily even recommended.
* Your cart should be able to fit (with whatever effort necessary) through a regular front-door-sized opening. If it's wide, maybe use hinges?
* Helmets may be a good idea for some. Actually - WE RECOMMEND HELMETS!
* You and your cart should be prepared for hostile weather, including snow. Build a sled apparatus, if needed.

Okay, so we should decorate the cart. Should we also wear costumes?
Absolutely. Creativity is a huge part of this event. Wild costumes and insane themes are wholly encouraged. The first rule of Chiditarod is... fun is mandatory.

What do I do with my cart after the race?
Pack it in, pack it out. Your cart is your responsiblity. The New York organizers faced a $5,000 fine in 2006 due to race entrants not accounting for their carts. So please, be respectful and LEAVE NO TRACE. Take the cart to a supermarket, perhaps. Or loan it to someone. There were a few 2007 teams that did NOT take care of their carts. This year there is a $25 "cart insurance" deposit, which you will recieve back at the end of the race after you take your cart away with you."

1 comment:

Eudocimus albus said...

unfortunately i was unable to find this haiku in its kanji form.

it translates into

by my new banana plant /
the first sign of something I loathe—
/ a miscanthus bud!

written in 1680 by basho